Come With Me
by crankthatphan
Summary: The one where Lucifer is, like, totally smitten for a certain King of Hell.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One - You Seem Tired**

It's been about a year since we've entered the human world.

I've been cramped in this apartment for the entire time, and it's driving me crazy.

I'm going absolutely ballistic.

That kissup of a demon, Ashiya, has been pissing me off so badly I want to kill myself.

I'm only still in this wretched world because of lack of magic, the internet, and Maou.

Oh my sweet Maou.

The orange colour of his eyes brings a shiver to my spine everytime I stare into them.

I utterly lust for the man, but he's straight.

And, even though I can't stand her, I wouldn't do that to Miss Highschool.

"Urushihara?" Maou asks sleepily.

"Yeah?" I mumble, my eyes glued to the computer screen infront of me.

"Why aren't you asleep yet?" he yawns.

I glance at him to see him taking off his shirt. That body is just so tempting..

"Urushihara?"

"I'm not tired." I say quickly, trying to sound bitter.

Maou snickers. "You seem tired. The circles under your eyes are almost as purple as your hair. You really need to sleep."

I sigh angrily. "Don't you think I would if I could? It's such a pain sleeping in cardboard boxes, you know. It's nowhere near comfortable, and no matter how hard I try to fall asleep, I fail miserably."

Maou rolls his beautiful eyes.

His beauty kills me.

"It's no worse than sleeping on a mat."

I glare at him. "I would assume for it to be much better to sleep on a mat."

"Then how about we trade spots for a night?" he snaps, aggravated at me.

My heart races at the thought of lying my head on Maou's pillow and engulfing my face with is scent.

But if I were to end up sleeping in Maou's spot, Ashiya would kill me.

_"You need to respect your king. What excuse of a demon are you?"_

"Nah. I'll just try again tomorrow night." I shake my head, turning back to the computer.

"It's unhealthy, Lucifer. Your body won't be able to take it. You need to-"

"Since when did the high and mighty Satan care about anyone but himself?"

Maou sighs and rubs his temples. "You know what? Fine. You can stay up tonight. But tomorrow you are sleeping. King's orders."

"Yes my queen." I say sarcastically.

He kicks me and lays on the floor next to his puppy, also known as the housewife Ashiya.

I wait for about 10 minutes then look to Sadao as I hear his snoring.

He's so adorable when he sleeps.

I stare at every feature of his body.

The rise and fall of his chest, the way his navy hair looks when pushed against a pillow..

Wow.

I'm turning into one of those fangirls or whatever.

I guess Mr. Hierarchy was right.

I _do_ need sleep.

_(A/N Yay for crappy first chapters! x3)_


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two - It's Like Screaming But With Ice**

"What do you want?" I groan, looking up to the tall white-haired shemale standing over me.

"Get off that device and do something productive for your king."

"Being on the internet is productive."

"In what way?"

"Could you two stop arguing?" Maou whines, covering his head with his pillow.

"Sorry Sire." Alciel says quickly.

"Anything for you, master." I mumble, rolling my eyes.

_~Short and Majestic Time Skip~_

"I told you not to eat all the ice cream!"

"What am I to do when there isn't any decent food in this place?"

"Maybe go out and buy some?"

"With the money you don't ever leave me with? Gladly."

"You know what? I'm sick of this," Maou says angrily. "Hanzo, put your shoes on, we're going shopping. Ashiya, you stay here and don't do anything stupid. Got it?"

Ashiya and I nod.

A trip out in town sounds terrible.

I'm going to have to deal with people, and that is just a big no.

Dealing with people I've never met before is going to be much better than living with that.. Thing.. But I'd rather not communicate with the creatures known as humans.

_~Another Short and Majestic Time Skip~_

"So, any particular flavour you think we should buy?" Maou asks, looking at the flavours of ice cream as if he were a kid in a candy store.

"Doesn't matter," I mumble. "As long as it doesn't taste like shit."

"How am I to know what you think tastes like shit? Just say a flavour, would you?"

I glance at his pissed face, and might I say, it's pretty damn adorable.

"Just get plain vanilla or something." I sigh.

"Are you sure that's what you'd want?" he asks cautiously.

"It doesn't matter what I want," I say sarcastically. "It only matters what you, my Lord and Saviour, wants."

"Alright then.."

_~YAY ANOTHER TIME SKIP~_

"Do you ever wonder why they call it ice cream?" Maou asks me as we're walking back home.

I look at him as if he's stupid, which he can be very at sometimes. "Well, it originated from China. The first flavour they created was called Screaming Ice, due to the noise ice makes when put in a blender. They say the sound.. It's Like Screaming.. But With Ice." I say, sarcastic as always.

He laughs with that beautiful laugh of his. "Interesting theory."

"Thank you."

* * *

_A/N: So um, this story is probably going to end up very crappy due to the fact that I have no special planning for this, it's literally just an "as I go along" thing._

_Also, I may or may not make the characters ooc, so yeah.._

_Have a nice day. c: Or night. Whatever time of day. ~_


	3. Chapter 3

_(A/N) Murrgghh I'm so happy you guys are actually enjoying this because I feel like it's total crap and you guys just make my day and I love all of you. _

* * *

**Chapter Three - Untitled Chapter Because I'm Lazy :P Get used to it.**

"But.. Sire!" Alciel says.

"No buts. Don't argue with me." Maou sighs angrily.

"I really don't have to sleep, I mean-" I start.

Maou cuts me off. "Yes, you do. It's unhealthy. I'll see you guys in the morning. Don't get into any trouble."

I watch him walk out the door, my mouth slightly agape.

"I can't believe you convinced him to let you sleep in his spot. Nobody should ever sleep in the king's 'bed' except for the king!" Ashiya rants.

I roll my eyes. "Did you seriously not hear me just say I didn't want to?"

"You said you didn't have to."

"Same thing." I say, turning my attention back to the screen in front of me.

Let's hope tonight won't lead to me killing anybody.

* * *

"Urushihara."

Not getting my attention by calling me that.

"Urushihara."

If I didn't answer you the first time, what makes you think I'm going to answer you the second time?

"Hanzo."

I only let Maou call me that without me getting pissed because he is beautiful unlike you.

"Lucifer."

Much better.

I turn my head to glance up at Ashiya. "What?"

"We should get to bed soon."

"You can sleep now, I'll join you later."

"No. Under my master's orders am I to make sure that you sleep."

"So it's now you care about me? Because your precious king told you to?"

"Well, yes. Why else would I care about a freeloader?"

"Because I'm sexy?"

It's true. Don't deny it.

"No.."

Well fuck you, too.

"Excuse me?"

Oh, I guess I said that out loud...

"Nothing." I mumble.

"It was most definitely something. You know what, I don't care. Just get to bed."

"Yes mother."

I feel a foot hit my rib and I yelp in pain.

"What the hell is wrong with you!?"

"To bed. Chop chop."

I stare at Maou's spot. As much as I want to lie there forever, I feel the urge not to.

I know it's not everyday you get to sleep where Satan normally does, but still.


	4. Chapter 4

_Okay, so I know this story seems all cute and stuff right now, right? It's literally the outcome of my case of writer's block right now. I had like this big climax planned and everything, but I didn't have the parts leading up to that climax planned, so yeah. You guys know the feeling, right? No? Just me? Okay. ._._

_But whatever. Enjoy~_

_Or don't. I could care less._

* * *

**Chapter Four - Another Untitled Chapter :D**

He flashes his perfectly aligned pearly whites. "I'm happy I got to spend the day with you, Luci."

I blush slightly. "Don't call me that."

"You know you like it when I call you that."

I cross my arms. "I don't."

He leans in and softly presses his lips against mine. "You do." he whispers, pushing back my hair and staring into my eyes.

"I don't." I mumble, breaking the eye contact and hugging him.

"Loving on me shows you do."

"Don't play me like that, bastard."

"I can play you however I want to."

"No you can't. Just because you're king in one world, doesn't mean you're king in this world."

"But I'm still your master. Even though you don't like it, you still obey my rules.."

"Because I love you. And I don't obey _all_ of your rules because most of them are stupid."

"Are you calling your king stupid?'

"Are you ignoring the fact that I just told you I loved you without hesitation?"

"Why would I ever ignore that?"

"Why would I ever call you stupid? Wait.. Don't answer that.."

"You're a jerk, Luci."

"Yeah.. But I'm your jerk, who doesn't like being called Luci.."

* * *

I groan as the light hits my slowly opening eyes.

That was the weirdest, and only, night vision I have ever had.. What are they called?... Dreams..

Since when was I so sappy?

Too much time around Miss Highschool has gotten into me. I need to tune them out better.

I sit up and rub my eyes, oblivious to the amount of people in front of me.

"Nice to see you're awake Mr. Urushihara." a female voice squeaks.

What a coincidence.

"Yeah. Whatever." I mumble, ignoring my growling stomach and jumping in front of the computer.

"Aren't you going to give Chiho a proper greeting, Hanzo?" Ashiya says mockingly.

"If she wanted a 'proper' greeting, she'd ask for one."

"Not necessarily.."

"Shut up." And maybe go fuck yourself while you're at it.

"Excuse me?"

Damn it. Why do I keep doing that?

"Nothing."

* * *

_Bear (- did I use the right form there?) with me, mkay lovelies? I'm tired, and my case of writer's block is terrible, so yeah.._

_ilysm_


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five - Just An Ordinary Day In The Mind Of Lucifer**

My blocking out of the world around me helps and destroys numerous things. It helps dearly with not having to deal with Ashiya, though is destroys my bond with Maou, on which I never had much of a strong one with him, but still.  
I try not to let it bug me.  
I do enjoy spending every hour of my worthless life scrolling through social media, playing video games, watching movies, or reading random articles on whatever I please.  
I prefer the internet over anything, and I mean literally anything. If I had to pick between ruling the world or being sprawled across a bed with endless Pocky and a strong wi-fi connection, I'd most definitely go for option two.

I know, crazy right? Why would a demon pick food and internet over taking over the world?  
Well let me tell you, control of Earth sounds perfect, yes, but with trying to do so I'd probably have to go outside and deal with people, and that is far beyond my standards.  
I could try to control the people of Earth through the internet, but it wouldn't be as successful as going outside to do so because not everyone spends all day online.  
Therefore, I choose internet over everything life has ever meant to me.

Worthless excuse for a demon, I know. You don't need to say anything.  
I've heard it all before, trust me.  
Apparently it's wrong for a 'freeloader' to breathe the same air as his king.  
That was actually never said, but you get my drift.

* * *

Occasionally I get the thought of how life would be if I were still an angel.  
Or how life would be if I were born a human.  
Or how life would be without me.

I'm almost positive if I were still an angel, I'd probably hate myself for being so perfect.  
Though having clipped wings, I would've been a badass angel.  
Which would've left to being cast out of Heaven anyway.

Life as a human would be cool I guess, depending on the era of time I were to have been born in.  
It's crazy how the evolution of humans have changed.  
They went from hardworking souls to lazy bums and prostitutes, not that I don't mind either one.

How people would be like without me is probably the hardest thing to think about.  
I don't think about it because I'm suicidal, I think about it because I'm curious.  
Curious as to who would be general, and if that poor sap would have to deal with the same shit I do.  
Curious as to if anything would've happened without my help.

What? You didn't think Satan convinces people to worship him by himself, did you?

* * *

I haven't eaten in an hour.  
I'm literally starving.  
There is no food in this cramped area and there is no way in hell I am going to go buy more.

But my stomach is eating itself.  
Listening to the growling of stomach acid burning at the fat that you don't have much of in your body is displeasing.  
Utterly. Displeasing.

I would seriously kill for a burger right now.  
Yeah, it's ironic how I'm craving burgers and the guy I'm in love with works at a burger joint, so it'd be a double whammy to go to McDonald's right now.  
But there are some obstacles I have blocking that from happening.  
1) I have absolutely no money whatsoever.  
2) People.  
3) If I were to overcome the above two obstacles, I'd have to get out of my quite comfortable position of sitting in front of the computer screen.

I know I'm a fallen angel and such, but God doesn't have to punish me like this.  
Can't he just set me on fire or something?  
Taking away food privilege at the moment is downright cruel.

* * *

The internet consists of many different types of people.  
I'm not normally one to label, for labels are for containers rather than people, but I feel as if these people annoy me almost as much as people in person annoy me.  
Why I keep coming back, who knows?

First, you have the smart people.  
The smart people on the internet are the ones making sarcastic remarks, correcting people's grammar, etc.  
They tend to be everywhere, so it's impossible to avoid them.

Then, there's the trolls.  
Some people troll on purpose to annoy certain people. Other people troll accidentally.  
Both types of trolls are dreaded by every other category of internet users, though they aren't the most dreaded group of users.  
People also refer to them as 'newbs'.

Next, there's the scene kids.  
Scene kids often complain about life or argue over band members and other nonsense.  
Most of the time, kids going through the scene phase spell like so: "omg mai mum iz so borin! halp meh plz!"  
There are a few kids going through this stage in life who use correct grammar and spelling, but are still boringly depressing.  
Often, they get mistaken for newbs.

After that, there's the weirdos and outcasts.  
That's kind of self explanatory, I assume.  
Sadly, they're never noticed.  
I find the people in this category to be quite entertaining.

Lastly, we have the fangirls.  
They are probably the most dreaded label ever.  
I mean, who wants to deal with squealing teenage girls who pretend to be married to a man who is too old for them and doesn't know they exist?

Me? Judgemental?  
I'm a demon, what'd you expect?

* * *

Evening is normally people's favourite time of day, I would assume.  
Not for me though.  
Evening is the time of day where I have to deal with.. Them.  
I wouldn't mind it if they made proper meals for me instead of giving me TV dinners.. And if they stopped trying to talk to me.. Or get me off the computer.  
That'd be nice.  
Really nice.

It doesn't take too much effort to ignore them.  
All you have to do is not care.

* * *

Finally, they're asleep.  
Now I can conquer humanity.  
And by conquer humanity, I mean play World of Warcraft.  
_"But Lucifer, that's what nerds play!1!"_  
Yeah, you could say that.  
Because of that reason is why I wait until I know the people who will judge me are gone and/or sleeping.

* * *

_A/N: Mkay so um, I've never played World of Warcraft.. I barely even know what it is, so don't judge me._  
_Yeah, I know this chapter has nothing to do with the plot of the story, but I needed SOMETHING._  
_ALSO, THIS IS THE ABSOLUTE BEST OUTCOME I HAVE EVER HAD FROM WRITER'S BLOCK!_  
_I feel that I should have writer's block more often. :D_  
_No, that'd be terrible.  
And please don't take offense to the internet stereotypes. I was literally just saying something that sounding like something Urushihara would say.  
Though most of those stereotypes are pretty accurate...  
ily _  
_Stay beautiful~_


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter Six - Delete**

I love the days I'm left alone.  
As much as I love to argue, it's very pleasant to have an hour or so of peace and quiet.  
I mean, when I'm alone nobody will think I'm crazy for laughing at the idiotic twelve-year-olds fighting over useless junk.

What's the point of social media anyway?  
The internet was originally a way for people to interact with other beings around the globe to discuss topics they enjoy, right?  
Then how come now the internet is a program consisting of World War III?  
I'm not complaining; I enjoy the pointless arguments, even the ones with meaning I tend to smile about.  
I just don't see the point in using the world-wide-web to argue when you could be using it to Google pictures of kittens.  
Not that that's what I spend some of my time doing...

Anyway..  
I have been thinking this thought for a while now, and it could just be the sleep deprive talking, but what if humans worked the way technology does?  
Everyone would be smarter, probably. Or maybe even stupider depending on how you look at it..  
And if something you didn't like happens, you could just "refresh" or "close the tab" and that will go away. Right..?  
OR YOU COULD DELETE PEOPLE YOU DON'T LIKE!  
Oh, imagine the possibilities.  
It'd be absolutely wonderful, would it not?  
A better version of Heaven, I'd assume.

It isn't weird that I've already started coming up with a list of people I would "delete", is it?  
It shouldn't be.  
I know humans probably spend their time thinking the exact same thing.  
What reason would they have not to?  
Due to Maou's older actions, humans are full of as much greed, hatred, and jealousy as us demons are, which would totally lead to their wanting of a more technology-savvy world to where you can remove your enemies, right?

* * *

"Hm, I'm glad to see our apartment isn't on fire."

"Our apartment? What happened to _'The King's Castle'_?"

"Why are you trying to argue with me?"

"In a technicality, _you_ are the one trying to argue with _me_. If you wouldn't have said anything when you first got here, this 'argument' wouldn't be happening."

Can I delete him?  
Like seriously, I want to take a knife and stab him a thousand times.  
I only haven't because if I did, I'd be in deep water with Maou again, and I'd rather that not happen.

"Very well then. Get back to whatever you're doing on that thing and we will exchange words no further unless being told to do so."

Ooh.  
That sounds simply delightful.  
I'm not even being sarcastic; that sounds fucking _rad_.

* * *

The door shuts and I glance over to Maou, him looking quite tired if you ask me.

"How was work, Sire?" Alciel asks like the formal bastard he is.

"Fine." he replies.

Doesn't look fine to me.  
There must have been one of _those_ customers today.  
You know, the people who cause a scene because their order isn't ready in two seconds.  
Or does that only happen in American television shows?

"Wonderful. I have your meal prepared."

So much monotone.  
It's almost like he was rehearsing it...

* * *

Around 10 P.M is normally my favourite time of day.  
Alciel is sleeping, yet Maou always decideds to bug, which is both good and bad.

"What'ya reading?" he asks, setting his chin on my shoulder.

"Get off of me."

As much as I want you to stay there, please don't.

"Okay then. But what are you reading?"

"An article about an era of Earth called the Stone Age. It's pretty fucking awesome. They had dinosaurs. You remember when they were first created? I love the detail of their skin."

"Okay, you can stop now."

I'd apologize, but...

* * *

_Okay this chapter was so much shorter than I intended, but I didn't want to update late, so here you go._  
_A pretty crappy and short chapter. c:_  
_Forgive me for mistakes, I didn't edit this chapter..._


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven - A Lesson On Internets**

Boring.  
Boring.  
Boring.  
Boring.

Wow.  
Social media is supposed to be interesting at one in the morning.  
Normally around this time is where the "freaks come out" and post random shit about their lives that probably never happened.

What people will do for followers is hilarious.  
Humans in general are hilarious.

One time I was reading an argument about snails.  
Snails.  
What sort of a topic is to argue over?  
I'd never assume snails.

There are many other relevant topics to bicker over, but snails?  
Just...  
Why even?  
Who cares?  
I just.. seriously cannot comprehend what goes on inside the average person's mind.  
Snails.  
_Snails._

* * *

Okay everyone.  
Listen to me right now because I am not going to say this again.  
If. You. Are. Going. To. Post. Something. About. A. Ship. Do. Not. Ever. Offend. Someone's. O. T. P.  
Got it?

As much as I love internet wars, sometimes they can get out of hand, especially the ones about a one true pairing.  
Like seriously, sometimes they end with suicide.  
Suicide over an irrelevant subject isn't good.

And even though I have a major role in putting the wanting of suicide into people's minds, I'd rather not it be because of something stupid like your ship not being canon.  
For real.  
Get over yourselves.

* * *

I think I need help.  
Like, serious help.  
I think I've turned into a fan girl...

I haven't shut up about Maou for about an hour.

This isn't normal.  
This isn't anywhere near normal.  
This is...  
What the internet turns you into.

A monster.  
An overly obsessive monster.

I guess the fan girls have created a literal "internet virus" that you can only get by being online for more than two hours a day.  
If that's true, let me tell you,  
It's.  
Fucking.  
Contagious.  
As.  
Hell.

* * *

_Sorry that this is like, super-duper short.  
I had not the slightest clue what to write..._  
_Obviously, these last few chapters have been fillers, because I am STILL GOING THROUGH THIS STUPID WRITER'S BLOCK._  
_I'm doing pretty good, though, I guess._  
_I promise this will get back on track soon._  
_Hopefully..._


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight - Just Because I'm Not Crying, Doesn't Mean I'm Not Dying**

Reading stories people post about their school's dances are interesting.  
It's lovely reading about people's first kisses and dances with the person whom they've decided to get out of the friend zone.

I was only being half-sarcastic.

It's cool how teenagers get their hormones fired up by dancing with people they think they love, though they are merely infatuated with that person.  
And then how normally afterwards, they get drunk, high, and/or lucky.

People can be really stupid nowadays.  
I'm looking forward to how their posterity will turn out.  
It'll be so much fun dicking around with their fragile minds.

"Ashiya, I'm taking you with me to go suit shopping tomorrow." I hear Maou say, his words muffled by the food in his mouth.

"Suit shopping? For what, Sire?"

"I want to look nice when I take Chiho to her school's dance Saturday night."

I nearly gag.

"A school dance? That sounds lovely, Sire. Too bad your suit can't be too high a quality..."

"Says who? I make the money in this joint so I'll be the one to spend as much as I please."

Woah, don't explode there, Satan.  
Oh, hey.  
The perfect combination of sarcasm and irony.  
Two of my favourite things.

"Would you like to come with us, Urushihara?" Maou asks.

I pretend to not hear him.  
I don't want to answer him.  
If I were to, he would probably hear the literal venom in my voice.  
Shit, anybody would.

"Urushihara.."

Ignorance is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ignorance is bliss.

"Lucifer."

Don't answer him. Don't answer him. Whatever you do, don't-

"Huh?"

NO. YOU WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO ANSWER HIM YOU FUCKING IDIOT.

"I asked if you wanted to come suit shopping with us."

No. You don't want to go suit shopping. As much as you want to see him in a suit, you don't want to-

"Sure. I guess."

Well, shit.  
Look what you've gotten yourself in to, dumbass.

* * *

"What about this one, Sire?"

Why am I here?

"Um, pink? No thanks."

Can I leave now?

"What about this one?"

Would they notice if I ran away?

"Why are you picking out such girly colours?"

I should bolt.  
Why did I even agree to come?  
Agreeing to go suit shopping with the guy you're in love with, who is going on something like a date with someone you can't stand, is the stupidest thing you have ever done Lucifer.  
And you've done some pretty fucking stupid things.

Falling for Maou was one of them.

I turn to leave a little while after Maou and Ashiya begin bickering over how 'girly' the colour purple is.

"What do you think, Urushihara?"

I slowly turn around, cursing myself for not leaving sooner. "I think the purple would look nice on you, but you should go with black because you don't know what colour Miss Highschool's dress is, and black goes with everything, so..."

Damn.  
I know you've a lovely fashion sense, Lucifer, but you don't need to fucking show it.

"See? I told you I was right."

"Yes. Whatever you say, Sire."

* * *

_Okie, I'm fresh out of ideas for the rest of this chapter..._  
_Hopefully next chapter, my brain will work again, and it'll be wonderful. c:_  
_So um, this chapter is dedicated to Draycos01 for the idea of Maou going on a date with Chi. ^-^_  
_I know I didn't put the dedication at the top like normal people, but I'm not normal, so..._  
_Yeah._  
_Stay beautiful~_


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine - Bravado**

"Are you sure this is my colour?"

"You look fine, Sire."

"Yeah. You look fine. You could fix your hair though."

"You think so?"

"I know so."

"Your hair looks fine, Sire."

"No. You can't look fancy on your torso and lower body but have your hair look like a train wreck."

* * *

"On your way, Romeo. Don't stay out too late."

"And maybe buy her flowers or something on your way, Sire."

"Oh. Okay. Bye, guys."

We wave.

"You think he'll be okay?"

"Get your panties out of a bundle, he'll be fine. It's a highschool dance, what could go wrong?"

"Many things have gone wrong since we've been here.. Countless things, actually, so who knows what'll happen tonight? It could be minor, like a kiss, or major, like an attack."

"Ha. Both of those things sound terrible."

And are unlikely to happen.

"Why say that?"

"Well, if Maou were to kiss Chiho,"

I'd be torn to worse shreds.

"Even if it was only because he was caught in the moment, she'd take it the wrong way, like most teenagers do. And an attack speaks for itself."

Like I said, unlikely.

* * *

"You could at least pretend to be happy for him."

Be happy that he's on a date with someone I can't stand?

No.

"Why should I?"

"Well, it is his first dance with someone he cares about."

Yeah. That's what you think.

I guess you don't pay as much attention to your precious king as you act like you do.

"And?"

"And you should be happy for your king."

"Because he's doing something I don't care about?"

Trust me, I care.

If anything, I care way too much.

"Hence the word 'pretend', Urushihara."

"Hence? What time are we in, the Victorian era?"

"Don't try to argue with me."

"Whatever."

* * *

**Author's Note:** This chapter originally had the lyrics to 'Bravado' by Lorde in it, but I edited them out on 17 December, 2016 (making the chapter a whole lot smaller than it was before. Oh well).


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter Ten - Maou**

I don't think you understand how happy I am that I didn't have to go through a highschool experience.

Seriously, teenagers scare me.  
It's funny how even Satan is horrified of teenagers, isn't it?

The only reasons I agreed to go to this dance with Chiho are

1) She may be freakishly crazy for me, but she isn't like the other people her age (at least I don't think she is).  
2) I couldn't say no.  
3) I needed to get away from the suffocating space filled with arguing and confusion, also known as 'home'.

I'm not sure where I'd rather be, though: home or here.

Although not being here would mean dealing with whatever those two feel like they should be yelling at each other about, I feel that I'd rather be there.

Being at home would mean not having to deal with teenage girls in short dresses and not having to pretend to tolerate the crappy pop/electronic music they play here.

I stay here, of course, because I can't take the risk of upsetting Chiho.

So I'm stuck around hormonal teens.

Yay.

* * *

"You don't seem like you're having fun, Mr. Maou." Chi says.

I'm not.  
I'm really not.

"What are you talking about? I'm having an awesome time." I smile.

"You really don't look like it."

"Just because I don't look like it, doesn't mean I'm not ecstatic to be here. Relax, okay?"

"Oh. Okay."

A friend of hers, I'd assume, comes over and starts chatting with her, making me feel really awkward.

I try to focus on the lyrics of the song that's playing.

It isn't hald that bad.  
Much better than the other stuff they've been playing.

_"But you will rememeber me._  
_Remember me for centuries._  
_And just one mistake_  
_Is all it will take_  
_We'll go down in history._  
_Remember me for centuries."_

I'm almost tempted to sing, as if I knew every word to this song (even though I obviously don't).

I feel as if it describes me perfectly; craving something (i.e attention) for a long period of time.

Getting it is probably, okay, it _is_, the best part

* * *

I've been here for about two hours.

The entire time, I've been expecting Emi to burst in through the doors and try to shank me or something.

That hasn't happened, and I'm hoping it won't...

"M-Mr. Maou?"

"Hm?"

"Do you maybe want to, dance with me?"

Dance?  
I don't remember the last time I danced.  
How _do_ you dance?

"Sure." I smile.

* * *

_I originally had a really good idea for this chapter, but I forgot what it was. ._._  
_Oh well._  
_Hopefully this story will start to go somewhere soon. I'm planning that it is, but I get forgetful so easily..._  
_Maybe, though, if I can finally sit down and write without getting distracted, the chapters could be longer. :o_  
_I want them to be, but that doesn't work out too well with me for some reason. .-._  
_Whatever._  
_ily~_


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter Eleven - A Blast (Or Two) From The Past**

(Back in Urushihara's POV, btw)

"Oh, what if Emi crashes the party?"

"Unlikely. I don't think even she has the heart to crash a highschool dance."

"I believe she does. She's pure evil."

Holy hell, you are such a fucking idiot.

"... No. You're overreacting. Big time."

Very big time.

"Me? Overreact? Nonsense!"

I try to stop myself from laughing, but that was impossible.

I fall from my position in front of the computer and onto the floor.

This is probably the most hysterical I've been in decades.

"Why are you laughing, Urushihara? This isn't funny."

"Are you kidding? It's hilarious. Hell, this may not be the worst overreaction coming from you, but seriously, Tyra Banks doesn't throw tantrums compared to yours."

"Oh really? Name one time I've had an overreacted overreaction."

"Well,"

* * *

It was a nice day out.

The sun was shining, the birds were chirping...

I hated it.

"Oi, Your Royal Pain-In-The-Ass, I'd like to blow some shit up, set some buildings on fire.."

"Hm, that does sound fun, Lucifer, but we have more important things to do."

"What could possibly be more important than destroying people's lives?"

"We'll still be destroying people's lives, but you know we have a system."

"Fuck the damn system, I want to destroy this city."

"Don't disrespect your king, Lucifer. He will kick you out of your position."

"Yeah, whatever Alciel."

"Don't you 'whatever' me. I am in a higher position than you!"

"And that makes you ever so horrifying. Excuse me while I scream my head off and run for my life."

"Stop messing around. Both of you, back to work."

"Yes, Sire."

"Whatever."

I went back to training the recruits.

Yeah, I thought about creating havoc in the current place we were in, but I didn't, so that makes me a good person, right?

Right?

Anyways, I heard a crash somewhere throughout the castle, so I went to investigate.

Hey, curiosity gets the best of everyone.

I then heard frantic screaming and found out that it was none other than the she-male it's self, Alciel.

I thought I was supposed to be the King of Destruction, but fuck did I think wrong.

The entire kitchen looked chaotic.

Pots, pans, silverware, china, you name it, it was scattered across the tile.

"What the hell is all this about?" I ask.

Alciel points to the raw meat sitting on the cutting board.

I approach the uncooked animal and almost fall into a botomless pit of laughter.

"You're seriously throwing a fit over not slicing meat properly?"

Alciel nods, his face red with anger.

"That's fucking hilarious!" I say, ending up laughing.

"It is not 'hilarious', Sire will be so disappointed in me!"

I continue laughing, toppling over.

"Stop laughing!"

"I.. I'm sorry, I.. Okay, I'm not sorry. It is so fucking stupid and funny how you think that your precious King will be disappointed because you improperly cut his dinner. I know he's picky as fuck, but really, you're overreacting."

"Overreacting? Me? No, I don't overreact."

"Mhm. Yeah. Because what just happened wasn't the ace example of overreacting about something."

"Yes."

"I was being sarcas- Never mind. Carry on with your life. Have fun cleaning up."

"Um, you're going to help me, right Lucifer?"

"Why should I? I didn't make this mess. I'm not the one who overreacts about a dead animal."

"Well you could at least give me advice."

"Advice?"

"What should I do with this.. Disgrace."

"I don't know, give it to someone else? Feed it to the hounds? Chuck it? Do whatever the hell you please, this is all your problem."

I left him be, snickering to myself.

* * *

"That wasn't overreacting!"

"Are you serious? Are you _fucking serious_?"

"Yes, I am serious."

"You don't seem serious. If you were serious, you would admit that you were overreacting."

"I can be serious and deny the fact that I am a drama queen."

"So are you admitting, or..?"

"No. I am not admitting to anything."

"So you won't admit to the fact that you go to the library everyday to read teenage romance novels?"

"How did you know that?"

"Just as I suspected. Your mind is fragile, like a toddler's. You'll admit anything as long as it isn't straight foward."

"What are you hinting at?"

"I am hinting that you are naïve as fuck."

"I knew that as soon as I came home, the first thing I'd hear would be arguing." Maou sighs, closing the door behind him.

"Oh, Sire, how was it? Are you hungry? Did anything bad happen? Did you kiss her? Tell me everything."

"Dude, chill. I can't listen when you talk faster then the speed of light."

"I'll skip to the important part, then. Did you kiss her?"

I take this as my cue to turn back to the screen in front of me, shaming myself for almost wanting to cry.

"Um, no. That'd be weird. Kissing your co-worker is like kissing your sister."

That's a pretty fucking bad example for this sitauation...

"Yes, of course, Sire. Are you hungry?"

"I'm fine."

Hell yes you are.

Bad joke?

* * *

He tightens his grip on my hands.

"Promise me you won't forget me." he whispers.

"How could I ever?" I whisper back, removing my hands from his and pulling him into a hug.

"I don't want you to leave Heaven. I want you to stay."

"I'm sorry, Gabe. I'm going to work for Satan. I don't care about getting thrown out."

"You can't leave. Only because he promised you wings? That's not a reason to go!"

"It's so much more than that."

"Then, what's the reason?"

"I... No. You'd hate me even more if you found out."

"I don't think it's possible for me to hate you more than I do at the moment, Luci."

I stay silent, staring into Gabriel's tear-fillled eyes.

"I hope you're happy with yourself."

"I am, Gabe. I am absoluetly proud of this decision."

* * *

"Urushihara." Ashiya asays in an annoyed tone, snapping me out of my flashback.

"Huh?"

"You were in some sort of trance or something," Maou says. "We were getting kind of worried."

'We.'

'Worried.'

Whatever.

"I'm fine." I say assuringly, continuing to read an article about the Bermuda Triangle.

* * *

_This is probably the longest chapter I've written, lengthwise. (Keyword probably)_  
_I'm ecstatic about this chapter because I finally sat down for more than a minute or two and wrote without getting too distracted._  
_I'd not the slightest idea where this is going, it just came to me and now I need to figure out how to carry it on..._  
_It's hella good though, so I don't mind too much._  
_Hopefully I can start writing more lengthy chapters. ^_^_  
_Until next time,  
Stay beautiful~_


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter Twelve Lion (One)**

"Lucifer, the King would like to speak to you."

Shit.

The hell did I do this time?

This better not be about that scene Alciel had earlier.

The melodramatic idiot.

I don't understand how he's a higher rank than I am.

I open the ruby-embedded doors, half-expecting a lecture about 'being a disgrace' or 'not helping with responsibilities that aren't even yours'.

If you couldn't tell, I'm the one always getting in trouble around here.

'Because I'm the youngest and the least important to prioritize'.

I don't understand it either.

I don't think I can count how many times I've been in this office.

It's kind of like my..

Second home?

Seriously, I've about every crook and cranny memorized.

I didn't do it intentionally, either.

I'm just literally in here all the fucking time.

Satan is the typical 'leader'.

You know, how in the movies the CEO of a company or whatever is power-hungry and has a large, creepy office..

And a dark voice?

And looks hella horrifying?

Yeah. 'Typical'.

"Ah, Lucifer." his voice booms.

"How the fuck did you even know it's me? You've your back facing my direction. Unless you're the freaky mutant the humans think you are?"

He turns to face me, the tension in the room rising about 7630921354%.

"I need to talk to you about something. Something very important."

"If this is about Alciel's meltdown, I'd nothing to do with it."

"What meltdown?"

"Oh. Um. Nothing. It's nothing. No meltdown. I was just joking with you, haha."

"..."

"So, uh, out with what you wanted to discuss."

"My sex drive has dropped majorly."

"Ohhhh-kay? And? Out of everything you could talk to me about, this is what you choose? Why consult me about this? It isn't my fault we abused our ability to sleep with mortal women. What am I to do about this?"

He narrows his eyes.

"Oh hell no. I am not doing that. That's disgusting."

"Disgusting? Whose idea was it to invent homosexuality?"

"...Mine."

"Okay. So why are you against your own idea?"

"..Because."

"Because..?"

"Just because."

"You sound like a child, Lucifer."

"Oh. Okay. So, you all get upset with me when I act mature, but now that I'm 'acting young like I'm supposed to', it's wrong?"

"Who all tells you to not be mature?"

"I don't know. Literally everyone? Do you understand how much it hurts to have everyone look down on you because you're younger than they are? Nobody takes me seriously. They think that their superior needs to be someone who knows what they're doing. They all think that because I was the second-to-last created by God and the last to be cast out of Heaven, I'm not educated enough."

"Alright."

"Alright? All you have to say is 'alright'? Are you shitting me right now?"

"No. I'm making a point."

"A point?"

"I ignored what you said. You ignore what they say. Do you think I'd have put you in charge of something important if you weren't good enough for it?"

"Can you tell that to everyone else?"

"No. They know. They are obviously jealous of your skills and are trying to bring down your self-esteem. Now, back onto my predicament..."

"Being a whore isn't a predicament."

"You're just a little ball of sunshine, aren't you?"

"Always."

"Alright then. So that's a yes? Oh, wait. I don't exactly need to ask you for sex. Because I am your leader and you will obey my every command. And this is basically a command."

"Dude. That's rape."

"And whose-"

"Okay, okay I get it."

"Besides. There isn't any 'legal' or 'illegal' here. You're just scared."

"Me? Scared? You're kidding. What am I to be scared of?"

"Definitely not me."

"Your sarcasm bites."

* * *

"Aw, poor little Lucifer can't reach the top shelf. Maybe I should get you a highchair."

"A highchair? Are you seriously that incompetent? Highchairs are for sitting at the dinner table. Mostly found in public eating establishments.."

"Whatever. What're you looking foe? I guess I'll get it for you."

"A demon? Being nice for once? Woe is me."

Akari rolls his eyes.

"I'm trying to get the salt and vinegar thins, my savior." I bat my lashes.

"You're annoying as hell."

"Thanks. Now get the bag before I skin you and play with your organs."

"Hey, Lucifer."

"What?"

"Why've you been eating so much tonight? You can't be both short and chunky. That's put King Satan to shame."

"Defiance.."

"What? You act like just because you've a high ranking, you're better than everyone else. It'd be improper of me to not pick on you."

"Okay. One, a high ranking wasn't my choice; I could care less what rank I'm in. Two, I do not think I am better than the rest of you. Three, if anything, you guys are the ones who think you're better than me because you are older. And four, what the hell kind of quack do you think I am? You're living in a place build by greed and devastation, so being improper is what you're supposed to fucking do, and if you think that not treating me like shit is improper, then fucking do just that because here, you are supposed to be improper unless the king says otherwise.

"Besides, I don't see why becoming a little obese would put anyone to shame."

"Lucifer, the King would like to see you. Again."

I sigh and follow Nathaniel to Satan's office, as if I needed his guidance.

"What is it now?" I ask, crossing my arms.

"Despair."

"What about him?"

"Not him. There's a lack of trauma in Madrid. You are going to do something about that."

"So I get to tear apart someone's life, then sleep with my boss? Oh goody. I feel like one of those chicks from those movies humans create."

"I don't appreciate your tone."

"You don't appreciate my sarcasm? You? Of all creatures?"

"Lucifer, we can do this the hard way, or the even harder way."

"There's no difference. I'll always obviously be your favourite. After all, I am the one you want to bone."

* * *

**Author's Note:** This chapter, and the next originally had the lyrics to 'Lion' by Hollywood Undead in it, but I edited them out 17 December, 2016.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter Thirteen - Lion (Two)**

"That's nothing to do with anything."

"Oh? So then, why didn't you pick someone else?"

"Well..."

"Admit it. I'm your favourite and I always will be."

"You won't be if you keep this sass."

"I've always had this sass. And don't try to say I've never used it against you because you know damn well that sass is the only language I speak."

"You sure are something, Lucifer."

"Indeed I am."

"Anyways, you were complaining about lack of explosions earlier, so now is your time to knock yourself out."

"But, what if now I don't want to create explosions?"

Satan tosses his head back in semi-sarcastic laughter. "I think we both know that you want to cause mass-destruction. It's been your dream since I could remember."

"My 'dream' isn't necessarily mass-destruction. I don't exactly have any dreams."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I don't see the point in it. Why want more when you already have everything you want?"

"Everything you want? What exactly is that?"

"Power."

"You aren't the one with the power here, love."

"Love?"

"Anyways, I've come to realize that our situation isn't deplorable enough."

"Don't go changing the subject here."

"The subject was only changed in the first place because you opened your big mouth."

"Wait, I'm confused now.. Do you 'love' me or do you hate my filthy guts?"

"Maybe you should figure that out for yourself."

Next thing I know, his hands are placed firmly on my hips and his lips are softly, yet aggressively, pressed against mine.

Of course it's instinct to kiss back, right?

Though, I'm not exactly sure if it's instinct to actually enjoy it...

I could get into fuller detail, explaining how the entire kiss was overwhelming, how I fairly melted in to it as soon as it happened, blah blah blah. But I won't.

Could you say I actually had wanted this..?

Hell yes.

You can totally say that.

You wouldn't be lying.

I'd been craving this for the longest time.

Most of the creatures that know me, or even of me, think the reason I forced myself to become a terrible person to get thrown out of Heaven is because I enjoyed the feeling of being rude and obnoxious.

As correct as that is, that isn't the reason I wanted to leave.

We can save that story for a later time, though.

I pulled away after what was happening processed through my brain.

Looking into Satan's eyes, I saw something I hadn't seen before.

Not from him, anyway.

It was lust, nothing more, most definitely nothing less.

He licks his lips, his eyes burning into mine.

"Come with me." he says, roughly grabbing my wrist and dragging me out of his office.

If it had been at some other time, I would've fought back (and lost, but still), but this time was different.

I...

I think I wanted that.

No.

I didn't think.

I knew.

"Where exactly are we going?" I ask, knowing the answer.

His bedroom.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter Fourteen - Is Untitled ahaha**

_(and we are back to the future! see what I did there? huh? did you? I need sleep ._.)_

"Urushihara?" Maou asks, his head resting on his pillow. "Are you still alive? Maybe lost in a vortex?"

"Umm, no.. Not lost in a vortex..."

"Oh. Okay. Good. You kind of zoned out there for a while. I was starting to get worried."

You? Worried?  
I feel as if I've said that way too many times..

I let out a shaky chuckle.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"How long have I known you, Lucifer? Literally forever. I know when something is wrong with you, and now is one of those times. Now tell me, what's wrong."

Oh, you know, just that fact that I was thinking about that time we had sex.  
That time I realized that the 'feelings' I had for you were actually true.  
That time I discovered that I'm always the one to be abandoned and picked on, regardless of where I am.

"It's nothing."

"Your 'nothing' says a lot more than you think it does. Tell me."

"No."

"Tell me."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to, okay?"

* * *

Do I end up telling him?  
Of course I do. He wouldn't shut his trap.

He always gets what he wants and that pisses me off.  
Though, he did once want me, and he got me.  
The fact that I still want him even though he's done with me?  
That also, obviously, pisses me off.

Anyways.

"I told myself I would forget that night," I say, lowering my head in great shame. "But.. I couldn't... And I still can't... I don't think I ever will."

"As weird as this sounds," Maou says, staring at the ceiling. "It's about the same here."

"Oh?"

Please please _please_ tell me the excitement didn't slip through any cracks.

"Yeah. I don't know why, but I just can't seem to forget. No matter how much I want to."

I get a weird sinking feeling in my chest.  
This happens to people, right? I'm not the only one? Please tell me I'm not the only one?  
I mean, I shouldn't be, yeah? Every human experiences what they call 'heartbreak', right? _Right_?  
Hell, they should.  
I may or may not have been the one to think of that to happen...  
What? I like wreaking of havoc.

Well, I guess I can't get too upset at this situation, since, like I said, _I'm_ the one who gave the feeling of pain to everyone.  
Damn.  
I'm almost tempted to apologize.  
Almost.

I nod in a half-hearted understanding.

"It's weird, huh?" Maou asks, turning his head to look at me. "How two people who've one of the strongest love0hate relationships can't seem to find out how to forget their damed past relationship?"

"Which was still technically love-hate," I nod. "But it was strong as hell."

"I don't think we can beat our past selves."

"I think we can."

* * *

_Like always, I hadn't any idea what to do with this chapter._  
_But I really wanted to update around Valentine's Day, and that's what I did so I deserve_ **_some_** _credit, right? As short as the chapter is?_  
_I do believe I'm finally to where I can build up this plot, though, so maybe it'll finally get kind of interesting. Kind of. Hopefully._  
_-cough- Also, you should -cough- Totally -cough- Tell me what -cough- You thought -cough- About this chapter -cough cough-_  
_Anyways, I'll try to get back onto updating a bit more frequently. I'm still pretty busy, and this writer's block (which I am slowly overcoming) hates my filthy guts, so..._  
_But yeah._  
_I love all of you. c:_  
_Until next time~_


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter Fifteen - Is Also Untitled haha (And it is un-edited, so please don't get mad at me for mistakes)**

_(and here's a chapter where I play with a bunch of words to sound more advanced..)_

Is condoning the situation really the route I want to take?  
Maybe what I want to do is tell someone, other than the one who already knows about it.. Because he was there...  
I'm tempted to go onto one of those 'Internet Confession' websites, but _1_. No and _2_. How would I phrase that? I fucked Satan ha ha life is peachy.

It wasn't until minutes to hours of deliberation when I realized; There is no way out of this and there never will be.

I feel like I'm trapped in a vortex; a fucking vortex that I couldn't feasibly escape no matter how vehemently I kicked and screamed. And what's worse about this is that it's like quicksand; the more you struggle, the further you go.  
I've tried not thinking about it, but that makes it even more terrible, because I'm practically dying to get out of whatever mess I've caught myself in.

It also sucks that I've been feeling this way for about a few thousand years too long.  
Craving someone's attention for a long period of time and recieving very little of ther 'affection' is utter torture, let's not forget never escaping that feeling even though they've already wasted some of their time on you.  
I guess actually getting what you want makes your desire for it burn even brighter, huh? Your guardian finally bought you the iPhone 5s and then boom- The iPhone 6 comes out and you feel that you'd be nonexistent without it.  
Even though you would exist. You just don't realize that because you're caught up in your own little cloud of greed.  
And I guess the worst part is, everyone- no matter how kind-hearted -has their own little cloud of greed.  
And it's fucking hard to get rid of.

"You really need to get out more, Luci." Emi says, patting my head.

I look up at her, an eyebrow raised. "Okay, one, don't call me that. Two, why are you touching me? Three, no. I hate the outdoors more than... Everything."

"I don't need to take orders from you," she says, crossing her arms. "But I'm sorry for touching you, I guess. All I'm saying, though, is that I think you should make friends who aren't people on the other side of a computer screen." _(A/N: Emi sounds like my parents ;0;)_

I roll my eyes. "Whatever."

* * *

I took Emi's advice, which is literally the only reason I'm walking the streets at one in the morning. I have no idea where I am; looks like some secluded area where nobody ever shows up to because there are bugs and drug-dealers. I'm.. not sure if there are actually drug-dealers around this area... but..  
Anyway.  
There are police- or ambulance- sirens in the distance, it's rhythm soothing yet aggravating my mind.  
Except for dangerously-dim streetlamps, the allies are filled with darkness, which makes them even more tempting to go down. So I do, because curiosity always kills the goddamned cat.

Garbage and dust, basically. It's full of broken glass, empty fast food containers, and dust and dirt. If I wasn't positive this place was abandoned before, this alley takes the cake.

I shuffle some of the stuff around with my feet, making a clearing to where I can sit down without a fragment of a beer bottle poking me in the ass. When I finish doing that, I cautiously sit in the tiny space I prepared for myself, instantly regretting it. The brick of the building is chipped and I swear I think I feel mold. ... Ew.  
Pushing myself slightly away from the wall, I decide to stretch my wings (since I don't need magic to do so _(A/N: At not in this fic haha...)_). The scragginess of the brick brings a bit of pain to the delicate feathers, but it's hell of a lot better than having them crammed under a t-shirt for an insanely long period of time.

No idea why (like seriously, not any trace of a clue why), but I start humming; what? Not sure. Just some random tune that I don't think I've ever heard before, since the last time I listened to music was... ... Okay then; I don't remember the last time I listened to music.

Moving on.  
I've such an urge to fly right now, but I can't, because there is a depressing lack of magic. Why fear is what gives us strength I don't understand; Angels didn't use happiness as strength, so why would demons use fear as theirs? Okay, I guess the better question to ask is _why are you questioning your 'crush''s logic?_

I sigh, lowering my head. Do people normally use the time around one to two A.M to think over every situation that has occured in their lifetime? Or is that just me?  
It can't just be me. There are people with much worse problems (due to my handywork; I curse myself for this) than what I'm dealing with, so really I don't understand why the hell I'm complaining. I guess this situation is something everyone goes through at least once, and even though I'm not really supposed to care about anything but my self, I hope most everyone has gotten out of this situation alive.

It's funny, isn't it? How smimilar human emotions are to dams; You can hold in something for so long until it finally breaks.  
I guess the heart works like glass; It's durable, but it cracks with too much pressure.

I blame myself for all this. Not just the fact that despair itself exists, but because I'm letting my sappy emotions take the best of me. I've never been like this before, _ever_. Even when he'd forced me to be around him for about a hundered years, I didn't think much about how I love the damn man.

Love..  
Hah.  
Never thought I'd ever say that word without a disgusted tone of voice.

Continuing my earlier statement, it's true I'd always been 'head over heels' for him, but did he drown my thoughts twenty four seven? No. He didn't. And I'm fucking glad he didn't, but I'd be even more joyful if he never had.  
It's hard falling for someone you haven't any chance with. Like, yeah, maybe they'll catch you, but they'll just throw you back into the ocean as soon as possible because rather than the trout they were looking for, you're a goldfish. A goddamn godlfish. And who the fuck likes goldfish? Yes, they're cute and all, but they aren't prize-worthy, something you want to be seen with. They die within a short amount of time, so what's the point of even having one in the first place?

* * *

I'm assuming this is what it feels like to be in deep poverty; sitting alone in an alley, getting attacked by tiny rain droplets, freezing cold because you haven't much to cover up with. All I'm missing is a tin can, stubble, and a bottle of booze (and shit could I use one of those right now).  
I could never actually be homeless, though. That's way too unsanitary for me. Besides, being homeless equals no internet, which equals no life basically.

I'm getting off topic.  
Heh heh.  
What topic?  
I've been out here for an hour and I haven't done anything but mentally complain about the conditions out here and process whatever the hell I felt like processing, which was basically just why I'm feeling the way I feel.  
I mean, Maou isn't anything to obsess over. Yeah, he's kind and handsome and self-confident and optimistic and- Okay nevermind that. He isn't worth my time and that is that.

Here, you know what, let's just pretend I haven't spent two hours mentally yelling at myself for having emotions. Let's forget that I ever even cared about anything. We can finally move on and I can continue my life of being an internet hobo.

So basically I just sit by the wall for another half hour, my wings outstretched and my mind clearing up from it's chain of foggy days.  
I stared at the wall, daydreaming, until a voice ringing through the streets snaps me back into reality.

* * *

_FEAR NOT! I HAVE RETURNED!_  
_Not for long though._  
_Some of my schedule has finally cleared up, but it gets busy again after Spring Break._  
_So I'm going to try and update at least once again before the break is over._  
_And then I'll be busy again until exams are over.._  
_I'm sorry I can't update as much anymore._  
_But hey, more time to write the story let's me make it better quality, and that's good, right?_  
_Anyways, please give me your thoughts on this chapter (or even about puppis, I don't really care, just let me know you exist).  
I love you all so much, I can't even put it into words. ^-^_

_Until next time~_


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter Sixteen - Another Untitled Chapter #donthateappreciate**

I decide to try and ignore the voice, even though the fact that it exists is making me _very_ anxious. I can't tell if it's male or female, which helps _greatly_ in this predicament.

I continue staring at the wall, hoping to just crawl back into my own little world of angst and destruction and stay there forever. Of course, that isn't what happens. Because what ever goes the way you want it to?

I hear a screech and next thing I know, I'm pinned to the ground.

"Mr. Urushihara, you're not supposed to have your wings out!" the voice, now obvious of being female, says. "What if someone else would have found you? You're lucky it was only me."

Yes.  
Lucky.  
So very.

"Yeah, okay, whatever. Just get off of me."

"Right. Sorry."

She climbs off of me, and I sit up, rubbing the back of my head.

"What are you even doing down here anyway?" she asks.

"Could ask the same thing for you."

"I.. I was going to the store, and I guess I started daydreaming because I... I got lost."

I bite my lip to hide a laugh. "Oh."

"And your reason is?"

"Needed to think. Wait, why would you be headed towards the store? It's like two in the morning."

"Girls eat, too, you know."

"Yeah, I know they eat, of course they do, I just.. t's awfully stupid for a highschool girl to be strolling around, _alone_, at this time of day. Besides, don't you have food at your house?"

"Oh! Uh, yes, but.. Mother doesn't like me eating junk food."

"Must be terrible. But that doesn't mean you should be sneaking around. You could get kidnapped, Mi- Chiho."

"I'm not afraid of getting kidnapped." she says, turning away from me slightly.

"Yeah you are. You're getting scared of even the thought of it."

"No I'm not."

I chuckle. "Look who you're talking to, honey."

"Right. Fear makes you stronger.."

"If it makes you feel any better, you're safe around me."

"Why say that?"

"Again, look who you're talking to."

"Right.."

"Hey, what would you do if your parents went into your room around this time to see that you weren't home?"

"I... I don't know. I never really thought of it."

"You mean to tell me you don't think about what the people you love would do if you left?"

"No... Is that bad or something?"

"Not necessarily. I just find it kinda strange how someone can live their life so.. Recklessly."

"This is coming from a fallen angel."

"That is beyond my goddamn point."

"Sorry."

"It's fine. Why do you apologize so much?"

"That's how I was raised.."

"Have you ever been assertive?"

"Rarely. Only when needed, I guess. Not many people are worth being rude towards, though."

I'm almost tempted to ask if I'm one of those people. Judging by the fact that she hasn't been negative towards me, I guess I'm not, in her mind. So then why do I feel like I am?

"I.. I know this'll sound really weird to ask, Mr. Urushihara, but.. Have you ever.. Felt.. Weird around someone?"

"Define weird."

"Like.. Different? You know, uhm, in love?"

"In love? Why do you ask?"

"Because... Because you seem so much more... Open nowadays.."

"Open?"

"You talk more than you used to. Normally you would have sworn under your breath or asked me to leave by now. I think you've got yourself a crush." she gasps. "Is it Suzano?"

"What? No, gross."

"Who is it then? Some girl you met online?"

"I'm not in love, Chiho."

"You totally are."

"I'm not."

_I'm not._

* * *

_A/N: omg is this what I think this is? is this.. an update? -dramatic gasp- so, this is my last little amount of free time before more stuff happens. like I did before, I will try my absolute hardest to update more often_  
_alsooo, I'd originally planned for it to be Maou who found Luci, but then I decided to not do that. the story is bending towards the track now, so the ship will finally set sail soon yay.  
I've been going through a lot of crap lately, so I apologize if any of the future chapters get all depressing-y and stuff.  
tell me what you think of this chapter? any ideas of what should happen in the future? what your favourite colour is?  
thanks for reading. I literally love all of you  
until next time~  
_


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter Seventeen - Dancing With the Devil (THE SHIP SETS SAIL) *unedited bc I'm lazy af***

After helping Miss Highschool climb into her bedroom via her window, I walk back to the apartment, the cool wind slapping me as if it were getting me prepared for what is soon to come. Not that anyone I live with would care if I were out. I could get killed and they probably wouldn't even notice until one of the girls brought my disappearance up, if they were to even notice.

"Luci?" a male voice asks softly. "What are you doing out at this time of day?"

"What are _you_ doing out at this time of day?"

"Looking for you, duh," Maou says, leaning against a pole. "Now answer my question."

"I was thinking."

"You can think at home."

"Why'd you call me Luci? I thought I've told you not to-"

"I can call you whatever I want, now tell me why you decided to sneak out."

"Why do you care?"

"I care about everyone, Lucifer."

"Doesn't seem like it." I say, brushing past him.

He grabs my arm, agressively pushing me up against the nearest wall.

"What the hell has gotten into you?"

"It isn't what's gotten into me," I say in bored tone of voice, hoping his strength won't increase with the amount of fear I'm trying not to let off. "It's what I've decided to finally let out."

His grip softens along with his facial expression. "Care to explain?"

"Not really, no."

"Let me rephrase it, then; You are going to explain."

I have no idea how to explain it, though. _'Oh, well, I'm falling for this straight guy who, you know, pretended to care for me and then pretended I didn't exist when he was finished playing with his chew toy'._

"There isn't anything to explain." I sigh.

His pushes me further into the wall, hurting my back like hell.

"There is always something to explain." he says, his voice sounding both worried and pissed off.

"Not this time there isn't."

"There is and I can tell. I've known you literally forever and I know how to tell when you're upset and this is one of those many times."

Many seems like a bit of an understatement. Who would've thought that making other people's lives terrible could lead to yours being terrible as well? Sometimes I wonder how different life would be if I hadn't fallen; how life would be if I never started to think those impure thoughts...

"It's nothing, okay."

"Damn it, Lucifer!" he shouts, punching the brick with his fist. "Why can't you tell me? What did I do to make you not trust me?"

I don't want to tell him. I shouldn't. He really doesn't deserve to know. Or does he? Maybe he does deserve to know and I'm just the one who doesn't deserve someone as precious as him?  
Yeah. Yeah he deserves to know.  
He deserves to know that I am nothing, even though he's already proved he knows that.

"I.. You know how people fall in love?" I ask weakly.

He nods.

"You... You fell _out_ of it. And that tore me apart. I had actually thought you cared about me and you didn't. You fucking didn't. I thought maybe I actually meant something to someone. I don't know how I could ever think that. Who the hell could ever care about someone as broken and worthless as me, right? And now, after all these horendous years, I still think about it. How you claimed to have loved me. How you claimed that my saying of your name is music to your goddamned ears. It's funny, isn't it? How I could believe someone as perfect as you would have any real interest in me.."

I find the ground pretty interesting, the dampened grass and slightly-muddy sidewalks. Anything is interesting to me at this moment, since I don't dare look up into Maou's eyes.

"Hey, Urushihara, look at me.." Maou says softly.

I slowly look up at him, completely shocked that he isn't smiling or showing any signs of finding this humorus.

Before I can comprehend anything further than that, his lips are against mine, and I instantly kiss back- being the hopeless romantic I am.  
I'd say some shit about melting into it or whatever, but there isn't any need for that; I like it very much and that is all that matters okay.

I don't know about you, but I'm almost tempted to laugh when I realize how I act all tough and badass, but I shrink and get really nervous around Maou. I don't know if it's because of his power or if it's because this is how infatuation feels. Either way I find him attractive and that's what's important I guess. His attractiveness...

What the hell am I blabbering about; I'm kissing the love of my life for crying out loud.

He slowly pulls away, staring intently into my eyes. He then engulfs me in a hug, and even though I don't normally do affection, there can be just one exception.

"I don't think you're worthless," he whispers, swaying slightly. "I never have and I never will. I love you way too much to think that."

* * *

_A/N: cheesy kiss scene yay_  
_ships setting sail yay_  
_an update yay_  
_having only about a month left of a busy schedule kind-of-yay_

_I both like this chapter and hate it..._  
_Tell me what you think (bc I crave your comments more than I crave that mineral. that meme died, smh)?_  
_Thank you so very much for reading and I hope you enjoyed this cutsey-ish little chapter I mangaed to scrape up in a week._  
_I love you more than I love GerIta (and that's a lot so feel very special mkay) _  
_Until next time~_


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter Eighteen - may or may not be untitled ha**

Now, I don't know about you, but epiphany occurs too much for me. _'Oh. Yeah. That just happened. This is happening. This is my life now.' _The worst thing about it's occurence is the timing. Sometimes, most of the time, it happens way too late.  
Like how I didn't properly comprehend that- thing- that happened until I'd say two hours later.  
Literally nothing is better than staring at the ceiling and then BAM; reality hits you in your stupid face like a brick.

What does this mean? What are we? How? Why? When?

My mind is a jumble, which rarely happens like ever. I usually instantly have a witty comment to say after everything, but if you insulted me while I was in this state of mind, I probably wouldn't even notice. Or maybe I would notice, but I'd just have a pretty late (or ignorant) reaction.  
I most likely would notice though..

I guess it's a side-effect. This happens to everyone after these types of situations, yeah? Everyone's stomach feels as if it were tied up in knots at times? Even when they aren't nervous?

I know I sound stupid right now. Freaking out over something like this is childish. I'm just... really... Wow...

How can something so good happen to someone so not good?  
And don't even try to pull the whole _'You're not bad, Lucifer'_ bullshit on me.  
I'm pretty sure I'm one of the worst things to ever walk the face of this damn earth.

But enough complaining.  
That was pretty fucking great. I'd even say it was one of the best things to happen to me.  
I know this sounds all girly-ish and shit, but his taste is still lingering on my lips and I am so totally craving more.

* * *

_Hi hello_  
_I know this chapter is short af, but I tried._  
_I'm done with testing and important events and such, so now my only excuse is writer's block._  
_Meaning there's a chance I won't be updating regularly._  
_I guess the deal with this chapter was mostly the whole 'okay they kissed; now what?' thing because this isn't really the typical style I write in, so..._  
_-cough- Anyways, tell me what you thought, blah blah blah_  
_Still love all of you, escpecially you cuties in the reviews like you guys seriously make my day_  
_Until next time~_


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter Nineteen - Sire..?**

I guess sometimes it can be cool when you're stuck alone in a pretty damn small room with the guy who turned you into a complete wreck due to your undying love for him, but try having him annoy you. I'm not necessarily complaining about his wanting to kiss me, it's really just his whining (and the fact that I am still completely confused about whatever our relationship is).

"Hanzo." he whines, dragging out the 'o'.

"How many times do I have to tell you to not call me that?"

"I can call you whatever I want."

"No you can't."

"So, I guess this means I can't call you my boyfriend, then..?"

"I.. I guess _that's_ okay, but..."

"But..?"

"I'm just really confused with what the hell our relationship is.."

"Well, now we're boyfriends.."

"Okay..."

Maou puts his hand on my cheek and turns my head to face him before pressing his lips to mine.

Like in some chick flick, we instantly get into some 'make out session' thing, reality not existing to either of us until the door opens and grocery bags bang against the floor.

"Sire..?"

* * *

_(A/N): Hi. I'm really sorry I haven't updated in like over a month. School is over, so I should be writing more often, but that isn't the case. I've fallen into a rough depression, and I haven't really been motivated to do anything at all. I wish I would have pre-written this story so I could update more often, but I haven't, so I ask that you try and be patient with me. I am not planning on stopping this story anytime soon, just please bear (is it bare? I still have no idea) with me._  
_I apologize for the short chapter as well; I honestly wanted it to be longer and full of detail, but I couldn't pull myself to do that._  
_Thank you for reading and for sticking with this even though I suck at updating and will probably never fix my laziness. I love all of you _  
_Until next time_


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter Twenty : (dedicated to Chibininjah)**

"So.. Let me get this straight; you two are.. a thing?" Ashiya says weirdly, stacking cans or something in the cabinet.

"Yup." Maou shrugs simply.

"How does... Okay, explain this to me; how in the _world_ did the _King_ of _Hell _fall in love with... with Urushihara..?"

"You say that like I'm some sort of low-life," I laugh angrily. "Just because I don't hound your beloved King doesn't mean I'm unimportant, and just because your ranking is slightly higher, doesn't mean you can treat me like a piece of shit."

"Okay, okay, calm down," Maou says both gently and sternly. "Both of you are really important to me and your fighting is going way too far. I don't know why you guys hate each other so much, but you need to chill. For me, and for yourselves."

Everything is quiet, except for the birds chirping their heads off outside.  
I look from the floor to the man at the cabinets, who is staring back at me.

We both nod, knowing that our differences will have to be put aside around him.  
Only for him.

"Good."

* * *

_(A/N): OKAY BUT THIS CHAPTER IS REALLY SHORT OMG I'M SORRY BUT I HAD AN IDEA FOR IT AND THEN I SAT DOWN TO WRITE AND THE IDEA WENT AWAY AND IT HASN'T COME BACK I'M SORRY_  
_but on a good note I do have an idea for the next chapter._  
_sooo as a celebration for school starting for me tomorrow (maybe even some of you guys are starting tomorrow how cool would that be), I have finally updated._  
_I'd gotten out of the dark feeling awhile back, but then some other stuff happened and bleh_  
_also I haven't really been motivated to write like anything even the fics I really love writing_  
_BUT I'M KIND OF MOTIVATED NOW WOOO_  
_okay this is getting longer than the chapter i love you bye_


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter Twenty One - Another Blast From The Past**

I get slammed against the wall, almost positive my head's left impact and my skull is partially cracked.

"You slept with him!?" Alciel growls, his eyes burning into mine with a fire I'd only ever seen once before.

"Yeah. So?"

"_So_? So you _slept_ with him?"

"It goes in one ear and out the other with you doesn't it? Yeah, we had sex. It was great sex, really great sex."

"How DARE you speak of the King like that!?"

"Uh.. Like what exactly?"

"As if he were only some object you use to please you! He isn't a whore like you are! _How many_ women have you impregnated?"

"Um, no-"

"None? _None_? Don't think I didn't see you with those women."

"Dude, just because I fucked some girls doesn't mean I had children with them. I don't care how evil I am, I wouldn't want to put a woman through that torture. That shit is painful."

"You're so manipulating and vile."

"Isn't that how I'm supposed to be...?"

Alciel scoffs and walks away like the diva he is. I really hate how a prissy asshole like that is in a higher authority than I am. Why the hell should people listen to him more than me? I'm not the one who's always complaining about every little thing done wrong. I only complain about everything else.

* * *

"Lucifer!" Satan barks, expecting me to walk up to him like a sad puppy with my tail between my legs.

I'm not like that, so I stay exactly where I am; on his black leather couch, eating potato chips and drinking red wine.

I hear his heavy footstep approach me, a small smirk spreading across my face as he stops. He grabs the bottom of my hair and pulls it, causing my head to fall back. I look into his eyes as he nears down.

"Lucifer," he says calmly, his breath against my lips. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"I _was_ chilling," I deadpan. "But now I'm staring at your ugly-ass face."

He pulls my hair harder, causing me to slightly wince in pain. "Listen to me, Lucifer, I admire the sassy little shit side of you, but I'm going to need you to me serious right now."

I nod as best as I can, earning a smile to appear at the corner of Satan's lips.

"Good boy," he whispers, sending a chill down my spine. "I need you to gather your recruits. We've got something messy coming up. Alciel is already getting some of them, but I need you to get the rest. He's going to be helping you per my request."

"I don't need his help. I can do it myself. I don't know what is going to be happening, but I'd rather look like an idiot than have to work with that... whatever."

"Too bad." he growls, pressing a hungry kiss against my lips and letting go of my hair before walking away.

* * *

I walk up to the brigade, my presence stopping everyone's chatter.

"Alright," I say as everyone silences. "I've got no idea what the fuck is going on either, so this asshole is going to tell you and then I guess I'll give you some sort of instruction or something."

"Thanks for the lovely introduction," Alciel mumbles. "Anyway, the angels are looking for another battle."

"Armageddon already?" someones asks.

"No. Just them trying to be superior to us. Our King wants us to prepare. I would assume Lucifer has trained you all properly?"

I roll my eyes, feeling him put a stupid smile on his stupid face.

"Okay boys, the artillery unit is open as always. Pick whatever you want, they won't mind. You know angels: they claim to be innocent but like bloodshed more than victory. Move it!"

Alciel pulls me to the side as the army runs towards the weaponry. "Don't think I didn't see you put your filthy lips against Sire's."

"You really are a dumbass, aren't you?"

"Stay away from him."

"Whatever, man."

He walks away, most likely to go kiss his beloved King's feet or make him a sandwich or whatever. I shake my head. Understand people's stupidity is really hard.

* * *

_A/N: WOW AN UPDATE IT HAS BEEN SO LONG HEY HOW ARE YOU GUYS DOING?_  
_I'm really sorry it took so long. School has been kind of difficult and I've spent a lot of time studying (and reading). I kinda forgot about for a while, so I apologize for the long wait._  
_I'm thinking about giving this story about nine more chapters. That number may or may increase. Only time will tell._  
_Anyways, thanks for sticking with me if you have. You're all so amazing._  
_Reviews are appreciated, they all make me pretty happy :)_  
_Until next time~_


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter Twenty Two - Knock Knock (&amp; First-World Problems)**

_**This chapter is dedicated to Nezumi . Yandere for being super-duper supportive. :D (and not to FanFiction for making periods seem like the spawn of Maou ._.)**_

I ignore the knocking on the door. If I'm not answering, they'll realize they are of no importance, and they'll leave. It's only just a matter of time. I mean, seriously though, what do you think is more important to me; some person I probably don't give two shits about or this forum battle about subs v.s dubs? Being fluent in every language ever, I could care less if the anime I'm watching is in English or Japanese, but reading people's reasoning is fucking hilarious. '_Subs are more authentic!' 'Dubs don't include reading!'_ Priceless. This stuff is priceless.

The knocking continues, and my curiosity is starting to get the best of me. I get up, slowly approaching the door. I open it, only to hear an annoying monotonous voice greet me in the most posh way possible.

"Salutations, Urushihara."

I close the door, only to have it stopped by her bony hand.

"Closing the door in someone's face is impolite."

"Annoying the shit out of someone who is trying to enjoy themselves is impolite."

'It appears someone is having a bad day."

I sigh. "Just make this conversation quick."

"I don't mean to pry, but a... 'little birdie' told me you and King Satan were.. together..., is that the word?"

I give a curt nod. "Yeah, uh, by 'little birdie', you mean the paper-thin walls, right?"

"Yes."

I gives another nod, less abrupt this time. "Well, the 'birdie' was right. Are we done here?"

"Yes.."

I close the door and go back to my spot in front of the computer. I don't think there's anything I love more than staring at this screen for long periods of time.

Other than that man I'm desperately in love with, of course.

* * *

Damn it, we're out of chips. Why is it that every time I finish a bag of chips, there isn't a second one for me to eat? What kind of world is this?

_'The one you helped create, Lucifer'_ yeah yeah yeah whatever. I get I've turned this world upside down, and have the potential to turn it inside out as well, but this is fucking outrageous.

My- what's he called? boyfriend?- works at probably the most popular chain fast-food place. They give you money there. Money buys things. Chips are things. We can have more than one bag of those delicious salted potato thins.

I'm making myself even more hungry. Damn these human bodies and their necessities. Food and water and sleep aren't important.  
Okay, well, sleep is pretty important I guess. Everything else? Not so much.

I can name like a million things that are more important to someone than food and water:  
Internet  
Air conditioning  
Hygiene - I guess water kind of has to do with that...  
Video Games  
Maou  
Common sense  
Wisdom  
Laughter is cool I guess  
Money  
and like a bunch of other stuff that I don't actually have the time to think about.

Really, people are just needy. No wonder I like seeing humans suffer; they're so damn _annoying_. But I guess that's because of my handy-work. Fifty points to Lucifer for making things he hates.

Oh well. At least we have Poc- damn it.

* * *

_A/N: This is a short chapter but ehhh. Who cares about length? _  
_So I was rereading this story after rereading reviews, and I honestly cringed a lot. It's cute and humorous, I'll give myself that, but there were SO MANY TYPOS UGHH_  
_And I didn't address this last time I updated, but..._  
_THIS STORY HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR A WHOLE YEAR NOW WOOHOOO!_  
_If I don't update again this month, happy holidays everyone. :) And if I do, I'll just say it again even though I'll feel kind of stupid. :)_  
_Reviews are appreciated._  
_Until next time~ _


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter Twenty Three - Romantic Meal With Lucifer**

_**This chapter is dedicated to DemigodPrefect. Your wanting is very possible and I will allow it. ;)**_

I've always sucked at cooking. Like, I once burned water.  
Water.  
That's literally not even possible.

But I think trying to improve your cooking skills so your boyfriend (and his annoying slave dude, but no one cares about him) can come home to a hopefully-not-burnt meal is great. Not that I'm saying you _have_ to cook for your significant other. Takeout is awesome. Really awesome. I may consider doing that. Buying Chinese, dirtying some pots or something, and telling him I made it...  
That wouldn't work. He's Satan. He knows when someone is lying. Hell, he invented that.

So for now I'm stuck looking at things online on how to boil a lobster.  
These things are really disgusting and overly complicated.

The things I do for love...

I've discovered via reading a cheesy romance story for research that chocolate covered strawberries are deemed as romantic for some reason, so I'm making some of those. I also went to the store and bought a bottle of champagne and two bottles of red wine for backup and personal purposes.  
I'm very prepared for this dinner, and although I'm sure I'm going to fail, I've got alcohol. Alcohol saves everything. Except lives of course..

It'll save mine though. Fuck everyone else.

* * *

Turns out chocolate is addictive, even when not on a tiny, baked breadstick. I tasted the stuff after melting it and it is so good. Where has this been all my life? Hiding from me? I'm not _that_ scary, am I?

To keep myself from eating the chocolate, I dip the fruits in it. The strawberries are then set on a thing of wax paper and are put into the fridge to harden.

Now I get to lick the bowl clean.

Which was probably a bad idea because now I want more..

I look over at the fridge where the strawberries are cooling. Licking the chocolate off them would make those fruits covered in my saliva, which would made them inedible to everyone other than myself and I probably wouldn't touch them without having an sort of fattening good on it..

Damn. I guess I have to wait.

* * *

"Urushihara, what's this?" Ashiya says, entering the room with a bag of groceries and a cliche teen romance novel in his hands.

"Not for you." I say, poking at the lobster in the pot with a wooden spoon.

"Oh, so it's for Sire?"

"Yeah."

He sets the groceries and his book on the counter and watches me poke at the lobster. It makes me kind of tense, and a bit insecure, but I continue going because fuck him.

"You have no idea what you're doing, do you not?" he asks.

I look over at him. He's right; I have not the slightest clue what I'm doing. But am I going to admit that to him? Hell no.

"Um.."

He rolls his eyes. "Move over."

I do as I'm told, but only because I have no idea what I'm doing and he's bound to do it better than I ever could. I'm not trying to be nice to him or whatever. I just want the best for Maou.

It's kind of hard watching him do what he's doing- all that fancy cooking stuff. It makes me feel useless, even though I know I'm not. If I were useless, I don't think I'd have made such a big impression on the world; it's partially my fault society is as bad as it is today. And yet I complain about it. I'm logical as fuck, aren't?"

"Why exactly did you choose a lobster, Urushihara?" Ashiya questions, his eyes never leaving the boiling crustacean.

"Because it's romantic or whatever." I mumble.

"Romance? You're trying to be romantic? You don't know the last thing about romance. You need to study stuff like that."

"Not every emotion comes from a book, shit-for-brains. Sometimes you have to experience things for yourself."

To my surprise, Ashiya smiles. "You're giving good advice for once. Being with Sire must make you really happy.."

"I.. uh.. I guess it does."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Hi everyone! This chapter didn't really take all too long to write. I was just postponing it for some reason.  
I hope you all have been doing well. :)  
Reviews make me happy, even if they have little to nothing to do with the story/chapter.  
Until next time, my loves x


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter Twenty Four - Date Shmate, Let's Make Out**

**Author's Note: **HI GUYS IT'S BEEN AWHILE.  
Sorry 'bout that. This chapter is really long, plus I've been super busy with school. Ughh. So here I am updating instead of doing my science homework.  
At this rate you may be stuck with me for yet another year. Oh whale.  
Anyway, I hope this chapter makes up for the wait. Things get kinda hot here. ;)

* * *

I've never been good at being romantic. Obviously. I mean, I'm one of the absolute most evil beings to like.. ever exist.  
Which is exactly why this whole fancy, lobster and candy-coated strawberries thing is making me very uncomfortable. It isn't Maou's loving gaze or the fact that Ashiya is begging to come out of the bathroom because the food smells good that's making me feel odd, it's literally the fact that this... _emotion_ thing is so new to me.

Yeah, I've been in love with Maou for literally ever, but that's way beyond my point. I would have never thought he felt the same way about me. Frankly, I thought he'd only viewed me as this annoying, too-hard-working and bossy sex object, but nope. I was so wrong. He _actually_ cares about me, and that's freaking great.

"I'm still really surprised you actually made this," Maou smiles. "Did you do it by yourself?"

"Oh, uh, I actually didn't. Alciel helped."

You would think it'd take a lot to surprise the devil, since he's seen everything, but nope. His eyes grew rather large and his jaw practically hit the floor.

"_What_?"

"Al..Alciel helped.."

"You're telling me you two actually _worked together_ on something? No fighting, no murdering, no... nothing bad?"

"Nothing bad, yeah."

"Holy shit.. I cannot believe it.. That is amazing, absolutely amazing."

"I guess.."

Thinking about it now, he isn't wrong. It is pretty amazing. We used to always be at each other's throats, but we weren't today. We're probably going to be again soon, whether it be tomorrow or twenty minutes from now. Not arguing with him was actually.. really great.

"Well," Maou smiles his gorgeous smile that has the potential to cure cancer. "that makes this meal at least twenty times better, knowing that you guys actually got along for once while making it."

"Oh.. Uh, thank you, I think."

We finish our meal and move on to dessert, which, I might add, is probably the best thing I have ever created. Like, ever.

Maou decides to be really cheesy and feed me, so I guess he's probably going to expect me to do the same to him. Who would've thought Satan would be such a sap? I couldn't ask for a better boyfriend, could I?

After I finish the strawberry he leans in really close and looks into my eyes. It makes me feel really little compared to him, and extremely vulnerable.

"You know," he says, his voice as seductive as it could ever be. "as nice as this is, I'm kind of in the mood for something else now."

"Oh?" I try my best to keep my cool. "What would this something be?"

"Nothing too special." he purrs.

Next thing I know, his lips are against mine and I feel like literally exploding into a million tiny confetti hearts.  
I kiss him back, of course, because why the hell _wouldn't_ I?

The table in between us is annoying as shit. I want to touch him, all of him, but I can't really do it with everything in front of me. There's too much in the way; he needs to be as close to me as possible. So, I decide to crawl- yes, crawl- on top of the table. He smiles as I do so and places his hands on my hips once I get there. Inevitably, my hands automatically go into his hair, which, by the way, is really soft. It also smells really nice and is such a pretty color and damn I'm getting off topic.

Is this what love truly feels like? Your mind goes off in every direction when you're with 'the one' and you feel like.. like you're floating? Like nothing else matters? Like no one can disrupt such a perfect time, even if someone actually does try to interfere?

After minutes, or what feels like it at least, we take a small break to catch our breath, our human lungs not being able to handle as much 'face-sucking' as we'd done eons before.

His breaths heavy and his eyes boring into mine, he leans closer, his tongue very slowly coming out of his mouth. I pulled him closer and kissed him, enjoying every second of him exploring my mouth even though it felt a bit odd. He tastes sweet, really sweet, and that only makes me want him even more.

I tugged his locks a bit, which led to him tightening his grip on me and pulling me into his lap. We're closer together now, and it feels amazing. His chest against mine, our heartbeats pounding against each other in-sync. Only a few layers of clothing separate us now, and I want all of them gone; I want to be as close to him as physically possible.

My hands move from his hair and down his neck, then over his shoulders and down his abdomen. He's in such good shape for someone who works around grease all day. You'd have to be an idiot to not be turned on by him, I don't care what your sexuality is.

His tongue slowly leaves my mouth and he pulls away, allowing me to take off his t-shirt. He moves his hands onto my ass and squeezes it a bit, making me squeak.

He laughs a little. "That was literally the cutest thing I have ever heard, Luci."

I punch his shoulder, my cheeks feeling hot. "Shut up!"

As he continues his giddiness tirade, I pull off my own shirt and throw it down on the floor next to me. Two layers down, four more to go.

Thankfully, he stops his laughter and catches on to my plan and pulls down my shorts. I kick them off and kiss him again, eagerly wanting the last three layers to disappear like they never existed.

Alciel knocks on the door again. "Hello? Is everything alright in there? Can I come out now?"

We ignore him.

Maou slowly lies down, my body on top of his. His hands are still on me, and they refuse to leave. Not that I want them to.

I stop kissing him, my lips instantly becoming cold and lonely, and sit up. He watches as I pull off his shorts. We look into each other's eyes as I pull off layer five.

And then layer six.

And we kiss again, hungry for each other. I'd felt lust before, but never like this. I don't want anything rough and meaningless.

I want it sweet.

I want it gentle.

I want it to be loving.

I want him.


End file.
